Character!

you seen the movie ' high fidelity'?? there is one dialog which everytime i watch that movie i see part of the dialog least 10 time ,rewinding it again and again coz i just cant get over it.

Rob: Top five things I miss about Laura. One; sense of humor. Very dry, but it can also be warm and forgiving. And she's got one of the best all time laughs in the history of all time laughs, she laughs with her entire body. Two; she's got character. Or at least she had character before the Ian nightmare. She's loyal and honest, and she doesn't even take it out on people when she's having a bad day. That's character.
[holds up three fingers]
Rob: Three;
[long pause, hesitantly]
Rob: I miss her smell, and the way she tastes. It's a mystery of human chemistry and I don't understand it, some people, as far as their senses are concerned, just feel like home.
[shakes his head, recollecting, then looks back and lip synchs 'four' while holds up four fingers] 


Rob: I really dig how she walks around. It's like she doesn't care how she looks or what she projects and it's not that she doesn't care it's just, she's not affected I guess, and that gives her grace. And five; she does this thing in bed when she can't get to sleep, she kinda half moans and then rubs her feet together an equal numberof times... it just kills me. Believe me, I mean, I could do a top five things about her that drive me crazy but it's just your garden variety women you know, schizo stuff and that's the kind of thing that got me here. 



the first time i heard this dialog, all i could think was this is who i really want to be.. is there is one thing people have to say , this should be it,'she doesn't even take it out on people when she's having a bad day. That's character.'.. and everytime i see the movie i listen to the whole dialog again and again.. i think on some sub-consious level i'm trying to imagine myself as the person being talked about.. least god knows i badly want to be.. and i know i've failed miserably when it comes to that.. but i'm an incurable optimist about the power of self.. no matter what has happened in life i do feverishly believe that my life will what i want it to be, or least i can be who i want to be.. so i've flunked half a dozen tests before,and i'll flunk the next few as well, but does it matter if you do pass one day?


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


This is something I had written to a friend quite some time back. Read it today and felt like sharing it! :-D

Every Girl has her Yellow Boots...

Saw Anurag Kashyap's That Girl in Yellow Boots.[Spoiler Alert]

 It's a very hard movie to pin down. For one, I'm still undecided whether I like it or not and for someone who has an opinion on everything under the sun, it's a mighty odd feeling. It's disturbing for sure, and not a movie I would recommend for everyone. Kalki is her usual brilliant self as the lost girl and so are the rest of the cast. It's hard to believe that it's Prasant Prakash's first movie and Gulshan Devaiya [ one who plays the kanadiga mobster] was priceless!! The only problem with the movie is the ending. It's too disturbing and a wee bit far fetched that the the father she lost was also her stalker. I mean how did he find her?! How did he/could her have known that she was coming to India to look for him? I hate movies with loose threads (unless it's left deliberately for the audience to solve!)

For me, it was less about a girl looking for her father, and more about a girl looking to be taken care of. For me it's the scene with her outburst which sums up the movie; and the secret forlorn wish of every woman out there. The build up to the outburst is just about perfect. Her voice is sweet and calm while asking her boyfriend with his self imposed chaining if he want anything to eat. Even when she has to clean up after him she appears composed, in spite of the taunts. It's his assumption that he knows her and what she's all about that ticks her off.

The script for that scene is brilliant according to me. It's something I've heard from every other girl I've known, the jist of it. It doesn't matter from where she is, but as a girl she's been asked to bend, compromise, give, give up herself for making life easier for people around her. And she does too. All the while dreaming of that one person with whom she'd be nothing but herself. To have someone who gives as freely as she does. Someone who will take care of her without asking something in return. To love and be loved unconditionally.

But we are flawed creatures. We, while having the capacity for unconditional love, are conditioned not to give anything without a price. And while not in such dramatic force as Ruth's revelation, it hits us all the same way, the disappointment- that unconditional love is myth; fairy tales told to make life easier because we all need that little bird Hope singing to get through!

I still don't know if I like the movie or not. The ending is still very hard to accept. But I think it gives a brief glimpse, a rare insight into what women are.

Musing on "The house of Blue Mangoes"

Started David Davidar's first novel.

This is not a review. More like my thought processes while going though the book. [This is my Spoiler Alert!]

Parts of it reminds me of Marquez's'100 years of solitude'. This one is more grounded than Marquez's fable, but the moment with the kingfisher took my breathe away.

The beginning shook me a little because I assumed [very wrongly] the pace would be more like 'The house for Mr. Biswas'. Judging a book by the title I guess is equally misleading.

And I was not prepared for vividness of the history when he talks about 'as European historians later put more modestly, the breast cloth wars'.  What struck me the most was how his women react. Set in roughly in the beginning of the 20th century, their reactions are uncannily like how women in the new modern Shining Indian still react.

But once I set myself to be a tad bit more objective reader and a bit less of an empathetic reader, it was delightful. With every page I turn I'm finding it more compelling. Esp. when he speaks though Padre [ as the English priest is called] and Charity.

Like the priest I know the mechanics of our culture, the caste system - but the emotional logic escapes me; in spite of having found my peace(?) with it, rather having lived all my life within the society which still clings on to it, it remains an alien concept to me.

As for Charity, it's funny that a 21st century, educated, employed, independent woman finds an echo in the thoughts and fears, especially the fears, of small town, uneducated house wife from the last century. How much of the world has really changed for women if I find myself facing the same fears? Sometimes I wonder if all the talk about women empowerment is merely another illusion of control we think we have over our lives?

---------------------
[edit on 13/9/11]

I'm not entirely sure why I'm surprised that the book should have a chapter entirely dedicated, rather obsessed with mangoes, given that the book itself is called House of Blue MANGOES!!?
I should have read it in summer. Now it's torturous to read about it and not be sinking in your teeth into lump of gold and sunshine! :-|

Chivalry... Why art thou dead?!

The other day me and my muse got into bit of tiff. She wanted me to have a go at the story with a chivalrous man as the central character; set in the present day!! I told her that even fantasy fiction has it's limits. 'Face it dear.. Chivalry is DEAD!'. She huffed and puffed but there are somethings about our times which you just cant change.

Just to make sure, I went and asked the girls to name a few chivalrous men they knew. Sure enough, they came up with a few name: Mr. Darcy; Sir Lancelot; Walter Raleigh. So I rephrased my question to name a few chivalrous men they knew for real, in the present age and time. They smirked and giggled like I just asked for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow! :-|

And just to reconfirm, I went to the All-Knowing-One, ie Google. The results*: 99.9% of all pictures turned out to be either cartoons/paintings/black and white photos :-/

No, I needed no more proof.

But I could not help wondering what exactly led to it's demise. Then out of the corner of my mind, the corner which stores random information about random people, I could remember people being chivalrous to one girl in particular. In fact a lot of guys used to fall over each other to try and help her. I know what you are thinking..She was cute, but not that cute. So I probed into the why. Why her? What is it about her that sent men all the way back to the Authurian Age?

Hmmm. She's just like any other girl when there are just girls around. But put anything remotely resembling a male in her vicinity and then suddenly she turns into new born Bambi!! Pupils widen; a certain languidness about her which makes her look like she's gonna fall any second; movements become clumsier and the clumsiness results in pouty lips or giggles and down cast eyes [ I have not been able to find the logic which dictates when pouty lips and when giggles are appropriate] ; and of course, for the life of her she cant do anything without the help of a 'strong, masculine hand' . The overly sweet,simpering temperament!!


Wait a second. Did I just describe the classic 'damsel in distress'? 0_o

Is that why knights are long dead and gone? Because damsels in distress are far and few in the post feminist world?? Do they feel out of place if they don't have someone to rescue?? Am I to understand that the independent women don't need chilvary? Did.. [hushed tones]..Did women kill chivalry?


Well, I guess common sense dictates that, 'of course independent women don't need chivalry!' Does that mean  they are averse to it? I doubt that. After which girl doesn't dream of being treated like a lady.
But does that mean she can't have it in her terms?

Hmm.. what exactly are her terms? I think this is where it goes awry. Standard ones are opening doors, pulling out the chair, offering to pay the bill, offering to carry something heavy when she's tired. But there's always this sect of women who snub the guy by saying 'Do I look incapable?'#glare#
I think for the sheer confusion which is created by what is chivalrous and what is questioning her ability to fend for her self, made men decide it's not worth it. They are simple creatures who are feel their very existence is threatened by confusion. After all, they are MEN. They grunt and decide. No namby pamby wondering which way to go.
And maybe that is why it is only for the absolute 'Bambi' type females, who are unlikely to spurn them thus that they venture forth to try.

Sigh.

It's a sad state of affairs. But maybe there'd be enough men out there who are not looking to validate their manliness and just be polite for politeness sake and help out the girls; whether she asks or not. Coz the secret is irrespective of what she says and does, she's thrilled in her heart's core when you do those little things!