More IOU notes!

Yes yes.. It's been a while and April-May was beyond busy. And yes, I know there's one pending from the last IOU as well. It's a tricky one. So for the time being I'm just gonna let it pend.. and that's not even coz I was/am lazy!

So what should we be expecting for the next few posts?

• Notes from my Note in Havelock
• Evolution of creativity ( and what it might mean now)
• Best things in life are free.. least Email is!
• Present laughter, a review

Well, I think that's about it for now.

Signing off, 

Me and my lazy Muse! :D

Madhav Mathur's The Diary of an Unreasonable Man Review

Well, that's two down and two more to go.. From the IOU note!

Moving on!

Sometimes you relate so much to a book or character that you lose your objectivity. You can't help but think it's a fantastic book. I mean, after all, the main character is so much like you and you are fabulous, right?! What's not to love?! The problem is that I've never been able to figure out if this loss of objectivity is a comment on the quality of the literature ( after all, great works of art are the ones in which you lose yourself, least for a while, right?) or just an emotional blind-spot born out of some ego massaging.

Either ways, I really liked 'The Diary of an Unreasonable Man'. After all it begins with my favorite quote of all time :

And it goes on to echo the sort of quarter life crisis we, ie pretty

Maybe not this bad :-/
Courtesy: cowbirdsinlove.com

much everyone in and around 25, at one point or the other have faced. For those lucky brats who escaped unscathed or not yet there, your standard quarter life crisis mostly consists of asking yourself :

1. What the hell am I doing with my life?
2. Is the pursuit of money really the pursuit of happiness?
3. Will I forever be a worker drone, an almost invisible and almost dispensable cog in the vast machinery of corporate-whatever-field-I'm-working-in?
4. Is there nothing/anything I can do to change the corruption/pollution/commercialization/pick-your-favorite-socio-political-peeve around me?
5. Will I ever break out of my comfort zone long enough to make any real difference to the world at large?
6. Some variant of all/any of the above questions which will make you lose sleep for an hour or two  of soul searching which then you'll give up on for the lack of definite answers and sleep. Least till the next bout of conscience attack.

So that's your basic dissection of your standard quarter life crisis. Anyways, where were we? Ah yes, the unreasonable man. We all have our moments. Like the time we sit and argue with the auto driver for that 4/3/2 or even one rupee change not because we can't afford to lose it but merely because we just got sick and tired of the bloody unfairness of the whole thing; Just because we don't want to cave in and be reasonable. But at the end of the day we continue being the almost invisible cog because the whole thing seems too daunting to take on our own. So Pranav, the protagonist, is so us with his slow and steady ad exec job and his frustration at the larger picture. 

One reason I liked the book was because it surprised me with the finesse with which Mathur handled the language. Call me a snob if you want, but most Indian writers who get published these days are very very shoddy with their English. But Mathur's got a knack of spouting cliches without sounding cliched; most likely because of the wry tone Pranav uses to acknowledge them. And his handling of English was far from amateur. Overall B+ in this area. ( Note : I'm a very harsh grader in general )

Another thing I liked was the tempo of the book. Just when you wonder how long is this existential crisis of our hero going to last ( I mean, we don't need to read this book to remind us how it goes, right?!) it picks up and gets going. And just when we start to wonder how long can anyone play the vigilante without getting into trouble, the story takes a twist. Another thing I appreciated was the consistency of the character, least the main character. Which is a pretty tricky thing to do given the rather fickle nature of the character. This is pretty much a one man show, Pranav's, with the other characters having little influence. But then again, the book is mostly from his viewpoint so I find it quite reasonable, the overwhelming 'I' perspective. 

Now the part that makes me lose objectivity. You know the dream where overnight you become a sensation because finally, and I mean finally, people recognise your genius and you go about setting the world right? To say this sums up the plot of the book would be doing it some injustice, but this is pretty much the allure of the book. But in Mathur's defense, he's done a pretty neat job of it. Unlike our daydream, his hero plans his execution meticulously and get himself into a pretty nifty mess in the process because changing the world also means creating a few enemies who liked it the way it was. And usually these are the big cogs in the machine! (Whether he gets out of the mess or not is for you to read and find out!)

But end of the day, it's biggest strength or weakness, according to me, would lie in the fact how often you have dreamt about being the hero. In a lot of ways, it reminded me of the feel-good factor I get after a chick flick when the girl finally says yes to the right guy ( As much as I deny it, there are times even I need my dose of sentimentality :-P ). Does that make it a bad book?! Well, I still say no, just the way some chick flicks can be good cinema( No, we are not going to argue on which ones they might be! I'm sure all of us have our guilty romantic movies we are addicted to). More over, the fact that it made me sit up and look at all the bill boards and life around me in general with a little more focus I think makes it worth a read.

Well, that's my take on it. Let me know if you think I was being unreasonable about it! :-P

The cynical sister says... :)

I'm a very cynical person.

I saw 'The Help'.

Ohwait... I forgot the connect. No, this is not about how I dint like the movie. In stead it is about why I liked the movie, in spite of it being a slightly Disney-fied version ( btw, is this a very Indian thing to do, or does everyone do this... making a new word by '-fying' it ?!) of the black emancipation. To explain why, I need to give a little bit background about myself.

Like I said already, I'm a very cynical person. Not the kind of schizo person who thinks everyone is bad and out to get you. Nope, I'm a more difficult to argue with sort of cynic- the kind that believes that people really want to be good, but ultimately they'll do only what is convenient for them. Period. There are obviously exceptions but at large it's a pretty good rule to hold 99.999% of the population. This might not make me a very nice person, but it sure allows me to be more tolerant and have lower expectations of people in general and that makes me a nicer person than I might have been.

Is anything Impossibile for these brats?!
Courtesy: goldenagemag.com

But there are two situations where this cynicism doesn't apply. 

One, with children. These fresh souls run largely on instinct and the sheer amount of energy, imagination and curiosity they have leaves little which appears to be inconvenient. Rather the thought process doesn't process convenience or inconvenience, just the way they don't always process good and bad. Which means these little angels and monsters almost always do things directly from the heart till they are told otherwise. And it's downright criminal to be cynical in the face of such brutal, life affirming openness and honesty. Every time I talk to a child, I'm renewed with hope that humanity is not entirely a lost cause.

The other, is when I see a sisterhood. It's a rare thing. And it's hard to explain the magic around one. It's not like an all accepting bond like a brotherhood. Nope, we fight, we bitch about each other, we even refuse to stand by each other occasionally. But we never cut each other away. Not even when someone wants to. In spite of all the dissension, there's a collective wisdom that holds the women together.

Viola Davis, Jessica Chastain, Octavia Spencer, Emma Stone and Bryce Dallas Howard : The Help cast

Part of the magic might be in the fact that a lot of times, the bond is formed without having a lot of common characteristics. There's no ulterior motive. This is pretty much the only other space, especially in adulthood, that I've seen where people think less of how it might be convenient or not and more about what the other person needs! And there's pretty much only one rule or code - Loyalty. But it's not your conventional definition ( we are women, ergo there can be nothing conventional about the way things are done.. esp the way men have defined it! :-P) but I wont even try to define it. One, because it's complicated even as a woman to understand it. Two, hehe.. Why give away the secret to men?! :D

Another curious thing is the fact almost always, the sisterhood is made of people who are not even remotely related. And I felt 'The Help' was a beautiful example of that kind of sisterhood.

[Spoiler Alert!!] One of my most favorite scenes in the movie is when Hilly Holbrooke tells Skeeter that she should not cut herself short just because her mama(Skeeter's) thinks she's not good enough to meet nice guys. For the most parts, Hilly's a self serving, arrogant woman who insists that she can never be wrong.  But you always bring out the best when you are rooting for a fellow sister! :)

Another favorite scene is the when Celia Foote cooks an entire dinner all by herself for Minny which gives Minny the strength to finally confront her abusive husband. There's pretty much nothing which can stop you when you have your sisters backing you.

Another scene which hit a chord is when Constantine talks to Skeeter under the tree; along similar lines,when Aibileen tells Elizabeth's kid in the morning to repeat after her,"I is kind, I is smart..." They are the Yin to your Yang, your sisters and that's what keeps you in balance.

Touchwood, because I've always been blessed with that rare kind of sisterhood all my life so far. I've always had women, some whom I am still in touch with, some I'm not ( and the blame's almost always mine!), who argued with me, comforted me, scolded me, complimented me and no matter what reminded me how lucky I am to be me! And that's why I like 'The Help'. Because it made a very cynical person sit up and reminded her that there are somethings in life which are unabashedly beautiful and one ought to be grateful for it! :)

MUUUAHH!! to all my sisters, past, present and future! :D

Curious and Funny Thing!

http://pinterest.com/ is my new found internet obsession. I'm not exactly sure why. This particular meme more or less sums it up!

Well, not that bad.. yet! Thankfully I caught on early that I might be more vulnerable than usual to the addictive-ness exactly because I can't figure out why/what is the attraction. Well, the initial pull was easily explained. They had a lot of DIYs which is a special weakness of mine. Gimme satin, paper,scissors and glue, leave me in an uncluttered corner and I'd be happy as a clam. The only easier way to make me happier is to put me away with a book in the same corner.. on my bean bag! :)

Anyways, started out by trying a few of the paper crafts and stashing away idea for future projects. But then the number of boards gradually grew. Score so far :10 ; which is not as bad as some of other I saw ! For now! Started collecting ideas for places and spaces, things I might use as inspiration to draw, yummy recipes I certainly doubt I'll try and of course, my favorite, the dream wardrobe collection which would, in all reality, stay a dream!

The curious thing is when I started I dint think it would mean much. It seemed the equivalent of an online scrapbook, nothing more. Well, it still doesn't mean a lot, but it did surprise me with a few things about me. Few things were a reinforcement of what I already knew about myself. Like the clothes I like. I love deep, bold colors over patterns. Simple cuts and styles are preferred. But accessories  need to be delicate and detailed. Nothing new there.

But when searching for inspiration to draw, that's a different story. Because I dint expect any particular pattern to emerge, but there it was. And being someone who needs to analyse every tiny detail of her life and rationalise why, it left me with a couple of curious questions. I found myself drawn to doorways. Show me a pathway, or stairs or anything which connects two different spaces and I wanted it on my board. Windows don't appeal, walls don't appeal.. no matter how pretty. Sometimes I wonder if it's because that's roughly where I am in life. At a threshold, both professionally and personally. And I'm looking for the freedom to move to any of the different opportunities which are present for me. And doorways are the perfect symbols to represent that.

Another thing which I found curious was the kind of people and faces that I wanted to draw. In all the free hand drawing I did, I never drew hands, only faces( that too abstract most of the times, and if there was a focus, it'd be on eyes). But when I started pinning, I found myself drawn, in stead, to lips. And picture where the limbs frame the person. I don't know what it means yet, but somehow I feel there's been a gradual yet definite shift in the kind of person I was to who I am today. And I don't know how, when these shifts happened. And I din't expect to find it through, of all things, Pinterest!

Self discovery is a funny, curious thing. It's not easy for sure. For better or for worse, we find it difficult to accept changes especially in the way we view ourselves. So most of the time we attribute the change to someone else's personality. How many times do we say 'She's not the same anymore' without giving a thought to the fact that we are not the same anymore either?!

But, at the end of the day I think it's a necessary evil. Some things might be sweet, but most are likely to be bittersweet, things you find out. But I still rather know if only for the fact that it might be the only way I'll get to change what I don't like. Or stick to it stubbornly ( which sounds more likely in my case! :-P ) And the fact that knowledge is power and self discovery might be the most effective way of empowering yourself for/against yourself!

Anyways, it's random ramble. More a reminder to self that we need to look into ourselves more often and we might just surprise ourselves. And that pinterest is fun! :D

'IOU' Notes for my muse!

Hey 'yall,

I know, I know. It's been a while. As usual I blame my laziness. My muse after getting back from her unscheduled, unplanned vacation ( Damn!.. She's so like me!) actually has been on a roll,  and I'm the guilty one who has been shirking my responsibilities. So I'm putting up some sort 'IOU' note so that I'll get to them faster... hopefully! :)

Things my muse's been musing about:

1.Curious things you find out about yourself through Pinterest :)
2. Learning from 'The Help'
3. Madhav Mathur's The Diary of an Unreasonable Man
4. Some reasons why I'm not an atheist and some why I may be agnostic

Well, that's all I'm promising for now. Hopefully this should spur me a little faster! :)

Finding my muse..Again!

It's been a while since I wrote anything. Not just in terms of the blog. Anything. Blog was just one of the places and spaces that I scribble on. Always carry a pen/color pencils and a book irrespective of where I am and where I'm going. Else I'd be composing pages long mails to any of my mad mad friends who are always patient enough to sit through anything I'm currently rambling about! It's a very unusual feeling for me not to write at any point in my life unless I'm depressed. But that's the whole point, I dont feel anywhere close to being depressed. And neither am I so busy that I dont have time to write. So what's missing?!


It's been very "And you never know, when it starts
Until there's fog inside the glass around your summer heart" - esque*

I'd been missing my muse. She seemed to have gone off on a vacation. As lazy as I am and as annoying as she used to be, I missed her terribly! And so I went hunting for her in the usual places. Read new books and old favorites. Saw a bunch of movies, all of which I more or less enjoyed but dint seem to have much to say about.

Listened to my old favorites of classic rocks which she used to hum a lot.But nothing!

Then on practically a whim and a fancy, went to see "The Artist". 


*Something's Missing -John Mayer
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This post's been in a coma for well, about a month now. So I'm taking a different approach. I'm going to do a quick summary of all the things I have kept pending.


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And You can't but help love Uggi too! :)

So like I was saying saw 'The Artist'.. (twice! :) and it was just as awesome the first time around which is saying a lot according to me because it proves there's some innate value beyond the novelty of the idea.) Jean Dujardin had me sighing (...again. Except this time I also had the time to notice Berenice Bejo as Peppy Miller. I dint give her enough credit the first time around.) The story line was predictable, something in almost any other case would have irritated the hell outta me. But with the Artist I merely felt it was because I understood him so well. Anyways, the point was that I found my muse along with Dujardin. He/the movie made me feel like doing something impulsive like sleeping under than stars ( well, I did grab a mattress and blanket and stay under the stars that night..sleep, not so much!). Grab a book and start writing again. Tear out a sheet and splash colors. And it felt marvelous, finding her again!


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Ode to Culcatta as well!

Saw 'Kahaani'. Vidya Balan rocks the heck out of it! The woman is beguiling in way few actress are in the industry today. She's playful, vulnerable, strong all at the same time. The last 3 mins being overkill and unnecessary is the only complaint I had. But the woman had me go gaga, esp when she goes all Jolie-que in the Bengali saree in the end. I doubt even Jolie could have pulled that off in a saree! :-P And I love how Culcutta is just as much a protagonist as Vidya is. You can feel the vibrancy of city and it's life teeming around her all the time.


Was extremely disappointed to know the 'inspiration' was from Jolie herself in 'Taking Lives'. Oh well! :( 
But I still strongly recommend it. 


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I dont get why they are like me!

Read 'Insects Are Just Like You and Me Except Some of Them Have Wings' by Kuzhali Manickavel. Something I've not been able to grasp entirely. Short stories which seem to have been written while having hash brownies! The funny thing is while reading, it sort of makes sense. The way dreams do while we are dreaming. But finish the story and look at the whole picture and things start to fall apart slowly. Like the way dreams do after waking up. But certain stories have morbid yet endearing aspect. Like the nose bleed story. It's hard to explain why you relate to it, but you do. The rest of it, I'm waiting to have a go again after #brownies. Hopefully it'll make more sense then! But then again, most things do after #brownies! :)


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Totally get why it's in the
top 10 IMDB Horror list

Saw 'Tale of two sisters'.  South Korean psychological thriller with horror-like frills. A movie which needed more than one take to see it from every angle. Wonderfully interwoven, the flash backs, the dialog. Can seem disorienting the first time but the second time is when you fully appreciate how delicately nuanced each scene was. Have to give it to the chinky* people. They really know how to get your goosebumps going!




*pardon my political incorrectness!


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Finally finished the Paolini's Inheritance series. Unfortunately I cant pass a clear judgement on the 4th book because by the time I got my hands on it I had more or less forgotten the other 3. Need to re-read from the start. But there was something mildly disappointing about it. Of the first three I remember the 'sitting on the edge and reading' feeling which was missing here. There were moments but the climax was, well, ok..Just ok! Still as a series it was well worth the ride. Besides there's something so inexplicably sexy about dragons that the series was just bound to be cool anyways! :)

Dragons Rule! :)

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Well, that's it for..the last month :) Take care folks!

Rewind... Goa and Nostalgia

Goa, a huge chunk of it,to me means Fernando's Nostalgia. Because it's one of the most awesome experiences I've had while travelling; because it was one of those places fueled all my senses, especially my 6th sense - Imagination!

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Initially was at north goa.. looks like a highly commercialised kerala too! Was really disappointed with it.. then went to south and old goa.. Now that part of the trip was fantastic( if the part where 1k was ripped off by our taxi driver is ignored!!!) 

The south goa trip happened coz both of us had read about this restaurant called 'Nostalgia' and wanted to go at any rate.. Honestly, if getting there is also counted it was the most expensive part of the trip, on it own.. but it was soo sooooo soooooo worth it.. I honestly can't start to describe the place..

type 'nostalgia goa outlook traveller' and click the first link.. it's a book link so cant paste the article..

 { http://fernandosnostalgia.wordpress.com/2010/03/22/fernandos-nostalgia-article-in-outlook-traveller-july-2008/ } [Another reason I dint write more about it was the reason this article does far more justice to it than I ever could .. Must read!]

The best part of the place was that it was better than the expectation.. and we had such extremely high hopes, which kinda figures from the fact that we traveled across the state just to eat at this place.. I can't explain how charged the place is.. least for me, the moment I stepped into the place I could feel the passion and enthusiasm of the man who built the place.. the details, man, the details... he's hung copper vessels( no fancy antique types, but ones we see in out kitchens) and name plates from the beams( amoung the many things he's hung!)..
And you can see red elephants peep out at you from the greenery , which surrounds the place.. I could (even) see a hummingbird hovering by one of the eater's head( for the flowers on the creeper which were hanging from the roof!)

Courtesy :http://travel.outlookindia.com

And talk about being eco-friendly( this place is more than 20 yrs old!!! Keep that in mind), for air conditioning, they have sprinklers on the roof and water there is recycled back thru pipes.. and barely any plastic in the entire place... if I had found a book shelf hidden anywhere amoung the eclectic collection I would either wanted to buy the place or least get adopted by the lady.. Best part was how the owner of the place came and talked to us coz we were so enthu about the place and she was telling us about her husband( btw, he studied in Christ!! Where I was studying at the time) and made the experience unbelievably personal...

Honestly, her husband sounds like someone we would have loved to know.. Want to go back one day and find everything about him and write a book on him.. the small insight she gave about how they got married itself( love marriage!) tells me his life would have been really crazy.. And you should see his picture too... so crazy looking!!! Have to come back and find out more about him for sure!! Me and Sanjay were sitting and wondering how it would have been for him to have started the restaurant since it was pretty obvious that he was from a well off family( just imagine going back home and saying 'Mom, I want to be a cook, for a profession!!!')

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It's been 2 and half years since I wrote this. It still haunts me in a beautiful way. And I still have to get back and learn the rest of the story. Yet another dream to bring true!

Take care,
Phil and his muse!

P.S : Do forgive the 2009 kid who was extremely careless with language!